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Flacid White Men Sweep Elections!


Mitch McConnell: In Charge of the US Senate

Although a minority today, traditionalist leadership in America has re-emerged to sweep control of the US Senate and House firmly to the side of rank and file hardline, conservative Republicans. How did this happen? Easy: Only about 45% of America decided to take the time to go to the polls and make their opinions known. When voter turnout is low, it’s typically attributable to a lack of interest on the part of the Lazy Left. Expect Mitch McConnell’s pledge to overcome partisan differences, and to make Congress a progressive, functional arm of government again, to last about ten minutes. In truth, though, there are so little differences between party ideologies today, since the driving forces underpinning their momentum and direction remain the same, it won’t matter. Expect more in the way of payoffs to the American Banking Industry, Big Oil, Defense and to the remaining One Percenters. And if you’re a gay, unemployed, and disabled Black guy I’d probably consider relocating to another country for the next few years, or find a job with Apple - read, Apple’s CEO, Tim Cook: “Proud (to take it in the ass)” below right.